To Peter Luruthudass Annaniah, 51, Malaysia Day is all about unity and multicultural families reflect that unity.
“This special day commemorates unity between East and West Malaysia, and in a country with so many ethnicities and faiths, multicultural families are a way of uniting different cultures, ” says Peter who is in product development.
Peter and his wife Maria Kirau Lusat, 42, live in Bayan Lepas, Penang. Both of them come from very different cultures.
“My father is a typical Indian man – very strict and deeply religious – that’s why our names are all very Indian names, ” says Peter, who grew up in Tapah, Perak where his grandfather (originally from Tamil Nadu, India), used to practice Ayurvedic medicine.
“In English, my name is Lourdes, but in Tamil, it is Luruthu, with the name Dass tagged onto it, while Peter is my Christian name, ” he explains.
His wife, Maria is from Kampung Long Moh in Ulu Baram, Miri, Sarawak. She is Kenyah (an indigenous people from East Malaysian).
They have been married for 15 years and just celebrated their wedding anniversary last month.
The couple reveals that in the early stages of their relationship, they had to learn to adapt to each other’s different cultural ways.
“I come from an Indian family and work for a German company where everything must be precise and on the dot, ” Peter says.
“Then, I met Maria, and it was a whole different world. In Sarawak, life is more relaxed, people tend to ‘take it easy’.
“So, when I come back from work, I have to change my paradigm because, at home, everything moves at a more laid back pace, ” he says.
“That’s why having an attitude of mutual respect and tolerance towards each other is so important in a multicultural family, ” Maria adds.
Communication can be challenging, especially with family members who don’t speak any common language. But it can also have its funny moments.
“When I went to see Maria’s parents ask for her hand in marriage, I remember talking to her mother and wondering: Why is she not replying? Is there anything wrong? Is she objecting?” Peter recalls.
But it was because she didn’t understand English and his wife had forgotten to inform him!
“My mother only speaks Kenyah, so it’s difficult for my husband to communicate with her… as the idiom goes, it’s ‘like a chicken and duck talking’, ” Maria says.
In the end, Maria’s father, who speaks good English, had to be their interpreter.